During a month plus of preparation for a holiday that lasts 8 days it’s easy to see the physical results of family sitting at the table enjoying delicious food. However, it’s hard to process the emotional results until I get to the other side of it.
Here I am, a few days later, still sifting through the experiences. Did I eat when I felt stressed during the holiday? Yes. Yet, more often, I sat with an emotion and let it be. As Geneen Roth describes, when facing an emotion: "notice it, welcome it, allow it, and accept it".
It took practice and persistence but I have moved to the midline where I can see both sides simultaneously, the side that is in pain and wants to eat and avoid feeling and the side that is brave and faces the feeling with curiosity.
I thought it would be a leap to the other side. Now I understand that it is a merging of the two. As I sit here on the other side of Passover, the redemption for me came in the form of being able to see both sides of me and hold both with love.